et in arcadia ego!

the only place i am truly happy these days is at the chaayer dokaan. on my way back home, i usually spend an hour and a half there, with my friends, singing, talking, smoking and drinking endless cups of tea. and my entire day is now centred around those hours wasted in complete idleness. away from the claustrophobia of home, away from the monotony of JUDE, far, far away from the malicious bitching, the cribbing about each class test and each term paper, and fighting tooth and claw for every hand-out, feeling betrayed, helpless, exploited, bitter, angry. feeling at a loss, directionless, somehow incomplete and inferior. i can't wait to get on the SD4 and get AWAY from all this shit!

yes we bitch at the chaayer dokaan, yes we quarrel, fight and scream our heads off. but there is a sense of security, of being understood for a change, of being accepted. we analyse the genesis of separatism in india, we debate about the concept of nationhood, we deconstruct marx and dissect the gender politics of the institution of marriage and the band politics of glass onion. and then when it gets too heated we talk of cabbages and kings. of the man who fucks his pet buffalo, and of bhola's diary, of mona lisa guest house and shubhayu's growing babai.
then when even that becomes boring we sing songs. and finally, spent we sit. and watch people stumble over the gorto in the pavement in front of us. and laugh like maniacs. have a final chaa and a cigarette. and leave.
that makes me happy more than anything else. i am not worrying about my future,i am not worrying that these guys would turn their faces away when we meet tomorrow. i am happy because i KNOW that tomorrow will be exactly like today. screaming obscenities, hitting each other, bumming fags, planning parties, being politically incorrect and biased and not giving a shit, singing, dancing, constantly passing comments (and judgments) at everybody around us,partying, drinking, puking, loving, hating, bitching, screaming being children, being happy.
and ten years down the line, this is the only thing i will miss, about my college years that is...

this, and the days spent at promod-da's canteen, i suppose it started out at promod-da's canteen,banging the tables and shouting about pluralism and anti-lpg...about IC and SFI (despite the fact that i, being a JUite, could vote for neither..)..but that's a separate story...albeit with the same characters...