a moment

I balanced all, brought all to mind,
The years to come seemed waste of breath,
A waste of breath the years behind
In balance with this life, this death.


is it a sin to be happy?what if i look around me and see dirt and death and indignity and violence everywhere and yet i am happy here and now?does that mean i am an insensitive creep?i am sorry but i cant deal with morbidity....very rarely does life on this planet seem worth all this shit,i agree, but it does sometimes,however rarely.these are my profound thoughts of the day.wonder why i am blogging with a vengeance?

i wish time would freeze. i like it right now. nothing special...but i feel unusually content...

somebody said recently that reading Petratch's sonnets is one of the great moments in one's life,like reading Keats's Odes for the first time...or Hamlet maybe....its a transformative experience...sure is...dunno bout petrarch...but when you are reading ,at times you stumble upon a line, a phrase, a sentence that is so beautiful and you think of the grecian urn...happens to me...its such a thrill of sheer hedonistic pleasure...its a heady experience, a surge of pride in what human civilization can achieve, a sudden revival of faith in the now dead and gone vision. if i could write something like that, i would die happy.