sgt pepper's lonely hearts club

a friend of mine came up with this brilliant idea,all us single people are going to unite and form a club of the aforementioned name,and there are quite a LOT of us out there. we are going to have regular meetings(read:booze parties) where we'll exchange sobstories and bitch about people who are seeing other people...we'll also have a band(lead vocalist:yours truly) which will regale us with thoroughly depressing music.members who are indulging in clandestine affairs are to be punished with expulsion.
what is surprising is neither the fact thar we are 18yrs old and already this frustrated,nor that we actually have enough lack in life to be enthused about such an idea,but that some of my friends who are in relationships are sad because they can't join our nesha sessions and want to dump their partners temporarily just so they can get sloshed with their friends!!now you cannot possibly beat THAT ,can you?you know what they say about the grass(no pun intended)being greener on the other side....
as for me,i am joining the club in a desperate attempt to tempt fate....and i look forward to the day i will be ceremoniously kicked out of it!!

refreshers

after one entire semester has passed us by,we finally got a fresher's welcome. i should we should be grateful that we got one at all. wonder what kickstarted our seniors into frenzied activity?could be our incessant nagging(yeah!thats right..we had to beg for a freshers),could be their "bibeker dongshon"...doesn't matter though,what matters is that we got one!ug 2-s went into a lot of trouble thinking up a weird quiz and a crazy(albeit exhausting) scavenger hunt...food was ok,and we had several glasses of cold drinks each(wish our drinks were spiked though)
Boy!are we hung up on our professors or what?i mean lets give the poor blokes a break...we are constantly gossipping about them,leching at them,and our seniors go a step further by organizing quizes about them {sample question:who poured ink down whose ears?}there was also a round of banging..............the DESKS,you pervert!!!that was our take of the buzzer round.then a scavenger hunt,where we tore through the campus like maniacs looking for the mass comm. dept.(which,apparently is located in the middle of nowhere)and then back to the english dept. again...thus we confirmed the already deeprooted conviction of the rest of the university that all judeans are raving lunatics!we created a huge commotion in our own dept,much to the consternation and amusement of our prof.s,..we caused suk chou to retreat back into his office,which,my seniors tell me,is a feat unparallelled!the expression on adg's face made me wish for a camera,sup chou came out saying"eshob ki hoche?"...we paid little heed in our madness.
gigantic gulps of 7up later,we settled down for a round of spin-the-bottle.this one ug2 guy had us in splits by his "jean jacket"performance,'sen' was the item girl,don juan had hug and kiss(ugh) an ug2 guy,the second part of his task remained unaccomplished(god be praised!!)after a couple of rounds of dumbcharades,the ceremony was ended by our seniors announcing unceremoniously"its over,go home,we're off ourselves!"the only thing missing was live music...man where is SUTTA?nonetheless it was an original idea,and extremely good fun!ug2 people, if you ever happen to read this-THANKS!

the answer,my friend,is.........

i have a question with which i have been badgering all my friends for a pretty long time now.no khillifying dude,i need a concrete answer now,what is it with guys and blowjobs?why are guys(the perverted jerks that they are)so hung up on blowjobs?i personally am of the opinion that blowjobs are freaky...why would you want to put it in your mouth when there are so many more interesting ,hygeinic,logical,and fruitful options present?i mean,c'mon,mouth is for FOOD for god's sake...and what guys like putting into it are not only their sexual organs but also their excretory apparatus,ugh i swear,how much dirtier can you get?...of course,i am but a naive ignorant fool. still,no guy ,however experienced, has been able to give me a proper answer to my question(which i ask from a very disinterested,objective and purely academic curiousity).you can guess my level of utter frustration from the fact that i am even posting such a blog..but trust me,this question has been bugging me for a long time now..so people ,jobab chai,jobab dao. ps:no indecent ,pornographic,or personal comments please!

i am happy

it is thirty minutes past midnight,i stand on my balcony..the street in front of me is bathed in an eerie saffron light,the night is chilly. wrapping my shawl tighter around me i rest my elbows on the railing and philosophically survey the streetdogs coiled up,sound asleep...kaleidoscopic images flash through my brain,all of a sudden there is an aching void in the pit of my stomach and a huge lump in my throat,i ask myself "hey what's this?"..having had no prior experience,it is sometime before i realise with a jolt it is nostalgia i am stricken with. i was 13 years old when i suddenly discovered that this world is a wonderful place to live in.the boundaries of my world coincided with those of my school and considering the fact that my school had always been (in)famous for its notorious lack of space,it is indeed a wonder that i never felt claustrophobic!i could keep count of the number of times i was absent from school during those 5 yrs(viii to xii)on one hand...school was a constant source of entertainment,school was a place where i learnt everything i know today(not lessons,the stuff which matters you now)...i learnt paradoxical lessons in deceit and honesty,chivalry and cowardice,how to get into scrapes and how to extricate ourselves by lying ourselves black in the faces,first crush,first heartbreak,first drunken party during the digha trip...man i could write a book on this and give the goddamn "war and peace" a run for its money....in short school was the only thing "worth living for,worth dying for,worth fighting for"(especially the last,the brawls inevitably ended with poor -undernourished -but-lionhearted -me being beaten black and blue!) and then,just when i thought we'd started rolling,it was packup time. no,i don't want to "go back",that never works ,right?i am happy,wherever i am...but when i walk down that familiar stretch from anandamela to phaari(ahhh!phaari ,even the phuchkawala knew us by names) i feel like just walking those few steps and rushing to school,i restrain myself,i know i'd just end up feeling sad and confused,though i hate admitting it even to myself,i know i don't belong there anymore..actually i don't belong anywhere..except perhaps in my gang ,people i've grown up with,people,who(i know for a fact)are similarly plagued on sleepless wintry nights by happy memories which leave them inexplicably sad......they are the people with whom i am at home,in the truest sense,god bless those bastards ,i love every one of them!sure i am happy today,at least i have them,most of my college friends have no one to fall back on you know,and i have sense enough to realize that nothing,but nothing,lasts forever,and that's the way it should be.but last saturday when we did go to school to collect passes for our reunion and we ended up spending two breathless hours playing hide n seek and kumirdanga in the empty courtyard like we used to, during countless tiffin breaks...i felt kind of silly but also in my heart of hearts i knew that i'll never ,ever in my life,be as deliriously,blindly,insanely happy as i was back then...no substance in this world can give me that kind of a high again i was kind of apprehensive about my own emotions regarding the reunion next week,now i couldn't careless,i already had my reunion! it's past one'o'clock...i might as well try and get some sleep...